This blog post is guest-written by Jebediah Forrester, a 158-year old man.
I don't know about your upbringing, but when I was a toddler growing up in the mid-19th century, I used to love the harvest festival.
After a long season of working 16-hour days in my family's thistle orchards, Pappy would finally let me and my 21 siblings take a day off, and we'd gather 'round a pan of Mama's corn pone and a pot of steaming thistle stew and enjoy each other's company without worrying which of us wouldn't survive the harsh Kansa-homa Winter.
The best parts of the harvest festival have been kept alive with Slide Ranch's annual Harvest Celebration. Sure, there's not as much dysentary, and you can milk goats instead of the traditional prairie marmot, but you'd be hard-pressed to find a more authentic harvest celebration this side of Amish country.
On Saturday, October 10th from 10am to 4pm, come to Slide Ranch for:
Scarecrow making - Now in my day, we used witchcraft to transform disobedient children into statues, but I understand these will be made primarily from straw. (Sigh) Simpler times...
Wool spinning - In addition to spinning wool for clothes, we'd also spin sheep for entertainment. You'd get the sheep as dizzy as possible and then race them across the barn. Then you'd eat the loser. And the winner. We were hungry in those days.
Relaxing in the garden - A lot of people think that we didn't know the meaning of the word "relax," and that's not true. We just defined it differently: "the time between when your heart stops beating, and your body finishes decomposing."
Coastal hikes - If by hikes you mean back-breaking work, and by coastal you mean in the thistle orchard, then yes, we did go on coastal hikes.
Great live music - I was actually a classically trained jug-blower and washboard player back in the day. I had ambitions to go pro until a giant tumbleweed came and destroyed the local symphony.
Now, the bad news is that it does cost money: $20 a head in advance, or $25 at the gate. $75 for families of 4 or more.
But the good news is kids two and under get in for free, as opposed in my day, when kids under two would have to work the fields for 16 hours at a time. And if they complained? No thistle stew for them that night!
So come on down to the Slide Ranch Harvest Celebration. Marvel at nature's bounty, and be grateful you don't live in a era when you actually have to live with her as your cruel, cruel mistress.

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